How Comparing Ourselves Affects Our Health

Hi my beautiful Sunspots,

This is me:

Photo by @fotobarnstudio

buuuuut this is also me:

photo fail but cute logo

I want to take the time to talk about comparisons in our world today. We live in an exciting time where we can connect with people anywhere in the world by using a little touch screen and it's amazing and useful. I am all about finding my hair inspiration on the interwebs and extensively reading Yelp reviews for... almost everything. But you see, this wonderful technological world also opens up a lot of room for self doubt and low self esteem. It's safe to say that we've all done it. Scroll through someone's Instagram life and think "man I want that" and that's ok, except when it's not.

We tend to get so caught up in the seemingly perfect lives of our mentors and favourite celebrities to the point that we forget they are humans too. They have real feelings, real bodies, and above all face more challenges than we assume. It is so important for us to recognize that these are real people and not walking plastic robots. Just because someone seems to have their shit together on social media it does not mean that they do in their personal lives. I have been guilty of this for sure!! I surround my feed with people who are inspiring and incredible, who have blogs and a great following. It;s hard not to think that they have mastered this whole thing but what I like to realize is that everyone has started where I am, at the beginning. I want to make this post about social media and jealousy because from my observations recently I have heard quite a bit of anger and resentment towards these successful people and I trace i back to old social constructs that are unnecessary.

Their body is not yours to judge

This is one of the most common things that I hear. People judging other people because they look a certain way. I have witnessed this conversation:

"look at her body"

"well I'd have a body like that too if I had the money"

"yeah I guess she can afford trainers and lypo"

now these were not the exact words but this was generally the way it went. Yes that woman on TV is fit and yea maybe she got lypo and a trainer but it is her body and she has every right to choose what she wants to do with it. Chances are she did not go through all those consultations and sweat sessions for you or to make you feel bad. She used her resources to change the way she looked because it made her feel better. I have also heard people talk on the other side commenting about someone who is overweight. So no matter what these people look like you are going to comment? I don't know. To me this is a sign of unhappiness in someone's own self and not those on TV. I am very sensitive around the topic of body image because as a society we have been told that one body type is ideal and the rest are less desirable. This is changing and change in this aspect is good. My beautiful friends, if you find yourself wanting the body of another, think of the five most unique features you have and strut that stuff daily! Kill that workout or eat an extra cookie but above all be happy and don't get mad at yourself for a little indulgence. Love yourself and you will feel better I promise.

How do they do that?!!!

I am constantly amazed by how some folks seem to be getting so much done!! They have a good job, healthy habits, go to school, volunteer etc. and still have time to fit some extras in there. It's a little freaky! Where did you come from and do your calendars have an "add three hours to my day button?!" seriously haha. I like to be full of things to do and at the same time I want to actually do maybe half of that. The truth is, I don't see that those people give up family time to pick up extra shifts or get help from their closest friends for support on projects. Of course they need help sometimes and face challenges, they're people and I see only one side of that.

What you can take away from this concept

Humans on the internet and in the public eye are just as complex as you are

If you don't have what they have, you have what they do not

Being resentful will not change anything but it could be a big damper on your day

Find inspiration and admiration because it is more helpful than jealousy

Eat cookies if you want to

At our core we are all flesh and bones

Bad days and jealousy happen, again no need to get upset with yourself

Love yourself

I love you

That was my bit for today, I hope this brought some wonderful thinking seeds to you!

Feel free to comment below or to dm me on Instagram @the.sunspot

Love and Light,

Sahara