Hello vibrant soul,
For the people close to me they know that I am ALWAYS in this place of change and growth. It doesn't plateau for long before I am on my next mission or adventure, especially in the last few years. I would say about every month I enter this deep feeling of "who am I now?" and I'll admit it can be a little scary. The feeling starts with some kind of catalyst. A thought I have that makes me question everything, a physical pain, anxiety, depression, a sentence a friend says about me and I decide it needs analysis. Any of those things can get the pot stirring for me. the stirring is followed by me asking all kinds of questions to my partner and best friend in a way that is way out of the blue for them but makes so much sense to me and then I spend a good while brewing my feelings in my head and body. That's where my new journey is birthed and that's all fine and great except I feel like I am in emotional limbo. I cry ( Pisces life am I right?), I get mad because I don't understand what the goal or point of all of it is until I know, which usually does not happen until everything comes full circle and the hard stuff is over, and I think about it for days and sometimes weeks. AND the biggest things, the ones that shake me up and turn me upside down have been happening almost every four years. All of this is something I find very interesting and gives me strength in an incomparable way. It's also exhausting to feel as though nothing settles. On the other hand it has shown me the comfort in knowing that nothing stays the same.
I am just at the point of my most recent transition where things are starting to ease up so I can start to fit the pieces together and understand what I am letting go of and what I need to work on. Who knows if these things happen because I am on a constant search to know more, to feel more and seek it with a great hunger or if it is happening because there is something I am missing. Still quite the time though! Anyways I think sharing with you my experience with emotional and spiritual might be helpful as well as some of the ways to identify your own shifts and some insight on them.
How do I know if something big is coming?
You feel it in your body
One of the ways I know something in my life is shifting is based on my physical body. This can look like your routine not feeling good anymore, getting sick more often, digestive problems or any stomach problems are one of the key hints your body gives you about your overall wellbeing. On an energetic level digestive troubles can be due to something in your life that you are not "digesting" or isn't flowing well for you. There is a reason why people say to trust your gut!
Things feel tight
I hope I can explain this well. If you have this feeling that everything is tight in your life it's a way of letting you know you are about to outgrow the skin or life you are in currently. This is so much a sensation felt in the mind but again can be in the body. The way this shows up for me is through frustration and anxiety. The little things I didn't care about a week ago become unbearable and need to change or be fixed. Your emotions feel stuffed inside, the inside of your chest is at full capacity and anything too rigid or structured makes you want to have a tantrum like a four year old in a Wal Mart.
Your emotions are everywhere and there is no reason
For some it could be snappy comments, unexplained anger, sadness, etc. and they seem to just all happen in a way you don't understand. It's a hard one to navigate because we are all emotional beings but with some intentional self reflection it's possible to see if they are leading you to a time of change or are part of something else. My go to is excessive crying and picking at everything. I love to overanalyze and then follow up with existential thought loops. It's not a great time but super useful in telling me what is going on. I would say that if you can get some time to be with yourself and be quiet and journal or just ask yourself if this is important for change or if it's the effect of something else that would be helpful. Tracking how you feel about certain things, for how long and when shows you, in the longer term, if you have any emotional patterns and what happens on those days to contribute to them.
You just know
Wayyyyyy easier said than done. I go through this process often enough that I have gotten pretty good at just knowing. As I mentioned before, seeing the patterns I inhabit has helped me do this. Most of the time now I just get a feeling that something big is being shed and making room for something else to come. I am blessed to have strengthened my relationship to my intuition enough to know these things. I'd say that if you are working towards building that relationship the most important thing you can do is trust yourself.
Love and Light,
Sahara